WHY ENVY

Why does envy exist? Why is this human feeling so persistent in the contemporary world? Everyone has experienced envy. What is it? Why do we feel it? Is it good or bad? How can we improve it from our side?

So, envy is possessing something that someone else has. It’s different from jealousy, because jealousy is a fear of losing something. Envy is wanting something that someone else has but that you don’t, and this feeling arises when we compare ourselves with others. These feelings can arise in fields such as profession, skin color, income, or anything material that someone else has.

It’s a good idea to talk about the reasons why we have this feeling. Here are a few that come to mind. 

• Comparison- When we begin to compare ourselves to other people, or we start doubting our worth, the natural result will be jealousy. The only solution is to accept ourselves as we are and learn to focus on our own strengths and values.
• FOMO-There are so many ways FOMO can rear its ugly head! This is a very relatable example of how we, as human beings, have to deal with envy. One thing we all have to learn is to deal with the sting of not getting what we want. The reality is that life is not fair. Things are going to happen that are disappointing. I think there are times when it is healthy to feel sad about that, but it is important to remember that you don’t have to wallow in sadness.
• Social and Peer Pressure- There are always external forces that will cause us to veer from the right path. There are always some expectations that people around us set for us, and this can be very difficult to live up to. Success stories of people around us or in our peer group can cause a feeling of envy in our hearts.
• Lack of Understanding-When we see other people succeeding, we may feel envy. The reason for this is that people don’t understand the struggles that other people are facing. They attribute success to luck and connections, failing to recognize the hard work involved and the effort required to achieve it.
• Desire- Desire can be defined as wanting something you don’t have. Envy comes from here. For example, some people desire love, attention, validation, emotional connection, etc. Then, when they are not able to obtain what they desire, they develop envious feelings towards people who do have it.
• Lack of Gratitude- Some people are blessed with a lot of things but still are not satisfied; rather than being thankful, they crave more. As a result, they have a bad, voracious feeling towards people around them who are doing better in their lives.

Now that we know why there is this kind of feeling, what can we do to avoid it?

• It’s easy to compare your self worth to the success or perceived happiness of others. You might look at someone’s great job, huge house, or a thriving family and feel like you’re falling short. However, comparing yourself to others never helps you or them. The only thing it helps to do is make you feel envious and ungrateful. Stop comparing yourself with others. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself.
• The journey to success is not always easy. But, with hope for the best and staying whole and true to yourself, you can come out of it with something great. There will always be some pain and struggles involved on your path, so don’t think that you’re going to miss something.
• We can’t tell everyone not to have expectations of us. Instead, we can just ignore the noise and focus on ourselves. We should focus on exceeding our own expectations rather than meeting other people’s expectations.
• Understand the struggle of the other person. Be more humble and think that they were genuinely more deserving. Just try hard, and one day, you will get everything that you deserve.
• I can’t say you to you not to desire anything, but be conscious that you don’t willow into desires and you are not thinking about them all the time while working on getting it. If you can’t live without something, why would you be trying to get it? If your desire for it is so strong and overbearing that it affects your mood and your energy, and you are not going to be able to get it, is it worth it? It sounds like a bad bargain to me. Your time is better spent somewhere else.
• Gratitude. Always have a feeling of gratitude for whatever you have, and always be thankful for what you get. Remind yourself that the things you are getting are still sought after by other people.

So this was all about envy. I hope you’ll work on this and won’t be envious towards anyone. Support the people around you and be humble and a person with a great heart. Be confident about the things you have, how you are, and the way you think. I’m not saying you should be adamant to your thoughts; you should always accept change with open hands. But, always be confident at every stage of your life. If you miss something today, life is great, and the things you want will come back to you when it’s your time. Stay optimistic and grateful.